Celebrating 10 Years Online

Saturday, December 14, 2019

THE JESUIT DALLAS STUDENT VOICE AND NEWSPAPER SINCE 1942 - DIGITAL SINCE 2010

THE JESUIT DALLAS STUDENT VOICE AND STUDENT NEWSPAPER SINCE 1942

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Humor/Satire

Humorous or Satirical Student Views, Opinions, and Commentary

Well, it’s that time of year, and if you have a girlfriend and for some reason have decided to look to me for advice on what to get her, I can do you one better.  Through years of experience and extensive scientific research, I've made a list of things not to get your girlfriend for Christmas.  Impressive right? For...
Homecoming is almost upon us, and it’s time to scramble and find a homecoming date. Now the first step in asking someone to homecoming is finding someone to go to homecoming with (assuming that you don’t want to go stag or don’t want to go at all).  There are many ways that you can meet a potential date.  There are...
Onsie upon a time…   I guess the first thing I should do is introduce myself.  I’m Drew, I’m a sophomore, I’m in band and robotics, and I make a killer PB and J. Alright, I’ve had enough of that.  I’m going to talk about clothes.  Specifically, a world of one cloth.   Imagine for a second a world where everyone has to...
Dear Everyone, Dee here with one last advice column. There is no specific question or topic I will be covering with this one, and if you’ve read all my other columns, you know I’m keen to go on rants, so, with no topic at hand, this one could get a little crazy. AWWWW YEEEAAAAAHHHH. Ahem, pardon me. I do in fact...
“Dear Dee, I have been accepted to five colleges. How do I now choose which one? - Ken, Len, or Glenn, the Undecided”   Dear Ken, Len, or Glenn, the Undecided, I decided to name you “Ken, Len, or Glenn, the Undecided” as a shout out to Jesuit Theater’s recent production of “Rumors”, and furthermore, because naming you multiple names plays on the idea...
Dear Dee, What will life be like after Jesuit? - Curious George Dear Curious George, Life will be different, interesting, weird, exciting, uncomfortable and amazing. It will be a plethora of experiences that will invoke all kinds of thoughts, feelings and emotions. I am now wondering if, while reading this, you noticed something about the commas in the first two sentences?...
Dear Dee, How do I know if I’m in love? - Lost Louie Dear Lost Louie, Love. Just think about that word for a minute. Ignore what you are reading and just let your mind flow. What does love mean to you? Do you even know? (I know you’re unsure “Louie,” but this is meant for reflection for the other readers.) Can you...

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The Roundup invites all students to submit articles that reflect their personal perspectives regarding politics, culture, student life, sports, art, music, or hobbies.

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Jesuit College Preparatory School of Dallas offers young men an excellent, Catholic education in the classical Jesuit tradition with the purpose of forming a community of men with high moral principles and service to others.

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