Sunday, August 9, 2020

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Viewpoint Humor/Satire

Humor/Satire

Humorous or Satirical Student Views, Opinions, and Commentary

For years, Jesuit students who fail to get a junior lot parking pass have been pushed to the outskirts of the school and forced to make the perilous walks from Willow to school, regardless of weather. These students struggle through the rain and cold to make a slightly longer walk than the rest of the students who purchased parking passes...
Ah, pizza. Multiple mounds of melted, magnificently manufactured mozzarella shelter a circular, sweeping, savory sauce covering a curved, copious, crunchy-chewy crust. The delight of many people all around (though it originated in Naples, Italy) is so popular that many languages still call it pizza. Even the Arabic word for pizza, "بيتزا," sounds like "pizza!" In fact, what is better than...
Homecoming is almost upon us, and it’s time to scramble and find a homecoming date. Now the first step in asking someone to homecoming is finding someone to go to homecoming with (assuming that you don’t want to go stag or don’t want to go at all).  There are many ways that you can meet a potential date.  There are...
“Dear Dee, I have been accepted to five colleges. How do I now choose which one? - Ken, Len, or Glenn, the Undecided”   Dear Ken, Len, or Glenn, the Undecided, I decided to name you “Ken, Len, or Glenn, the Undecided” as a shout out to Jesuit Theater’s recent production of “Rumors”, and furthermore, because naming you multiple names plays on the idea...
Apple's reign as America's most popular cell phone manufacturer has gone unchallenged for too long! Two years ago, I decided I could no longer live the mainstream life. Two years ago, I made the dramatic leap from the iPhone 5C to the Android S7. As I was incompetent when it came to my new phone, there was definitely a little trauma the...
If you went to the football game last Friday, you might have noticed an interesting face in the student section. What was peculiar was that it was a face without a body, nicknamed the Dion Scion (Dye-on Sigh-on). Created by Senior Rudder Allison, the Dion Sign was a popular addition to the student section, bringing good fun and laughter to...
Dear Dee, How do I know if I’m in love? - Lost Louie Dear Lost Louie, Love. Just think about that word for a minute. Ignore what you are reading and just let your mind flow. What does love mean to you? Do you even know? (I know you’re unsure “Louie,” but this is meant for reflection for the other readers.) Can you...
Well, it’s that time of year, and if you have a girlfriend and for some reason have decided to look to me for advice on what to get her, I can do you one better.  Through years of experience and extensive scientific research, I've made a list of things not to get your girlfriend for Christmas.  Impressive right? For...

About Viewpoints

The Roundup invites all students to submit articles that reflect their personal perspectives regarding politics, culture, student life, sports, art, music, or hobbies.

Articles should be written in a respectful tone, with language reflecting thoughtful and accurately researched discourse and, at all times, supporting the mission of the newspaper and the Jesuit Dallas community.

The Roundup will publish all articles that meet these guidelines without regard to endorsing any particular point of view.

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